Ripples of Thought

Alright, well, I just feel like I need to vent. This week has been, by far, the strangest, most stressful week on me mentally. I can try to explain why, but, even still, it will not even encompass what I have been thinking about.

To begin, as most know, I learned the absolutely horrible truth about the Church of Scientology. So evil, so disgusting, but, that is a story for another time. This week also contained a Thursday, as do all weeks, but this week's Thursday was different. This week's Thursday happened to be the anniversary of the passing of one of my best friends, Corporal Jennifer Marie Parcell. Damn, I miss her so much. I truly do.

Well, this week, to include the weekend, I learned how hard it is going to be for me to survive, and for my family to survive, when I return home. Granted, I will finally be home, and I will do everything I possibly can to take care of my family, but, it's going to be excruciatingly hard. I already know that I'm in for at least a thirty percent pay cut, and frankly, that scares the hell out of me. My wife and I hardly survive as it is. And even after I finally get a job, which is not an easy thing for people like me, who have been deployed to world's oldest combat arena, a.k.a. Iraq, I'll be doing something that doesn't make me happy, I guarantee it. The reason for veterans of the war having a hard time getting a job back in civilian society is because, by no fault of their own, employers don't want to have to deal with people with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). I don't know what else to say about that.

And, finally, the last thing plaguing me is this. In roughly five months, I will no longer be taken care of by the Marine Corps, and that scares me because, I need new Health, Life, and Dental insurance for my family and myself. It has to be affordable, but, I can't even figure out a good set, because I still don't know where I'm going to be working or how much I am going to be getting paid whenever I get discharged from Uncle Sam's favorite fighting force. I would stay in, but, I have to be able to be with my wife and daughter.

Anyway, I'm sorry for have wasting your time, I really just had to vent. If you have read this far into this one, well, thank you, it is truly appreciated.

~ by Jonathan Cockrum on Saturday, February 9, 2008.